This was the appy lady’s first exposure to this work and it was a lot to take in. I went to recap a little and asked the mare back out onto a circle as I talked through it one more time.  As it turned out, the little mare followed right through the turn and walked out of it straight without hesitation.

It hadn’t taken much: one moment of clarity about my feel to go right, with the time to get sure, and a release to straightness, plus one moment of clarity about my feel to go left, with the time to get sure and a release to straightness. This had been enough for her to figure out her knew the job: follow the feel for left, right or straight. There was an emphatic feel in how she followed that time that was so touching – to see her know for sure how to be right.

I came to a stop, as she blended with me.  She watched intently with that clear-water look of peace and clarity in her eye, and with a feeling in every square inch of her hide of connected readiness. What would you like me to do with my feet? And there she stood, with all the presence in the world. I had to swallow hard right about then. The feel of that, when a horse plops their heart into your hand, well it just touches the soul. No more so than when the mare then looked up her owner, as if inviting her to dance now. 

I was moved by this mare and her try. She was perfectly illustrating, step by step, the precise confusion that had set things up to pan out the way they had been under saddle. She buried the forehand in any transition, as she braced slightly in her concern about being wrong, and got out of balance as she tried to be accurate. Adding pressure at that moment had been confirming  or heightening her concerns and had been causing her to shut down. 

The truth is that the mare had had something of a dull, even sullen look about her at the start of the session, right along with her owner – neither one was enjoying this status quo.  I could see a new path emerging for them both now. Hang in there girl, I thought as I felt that mare on my line, trying so very hard to sort things out. See the light, it is at the end of the tunnel.

I responded to her presentation in a way I can’t say I planned. Feel is not about that list of instructions on how to do something right, but about… well, Feel.  Or rather, a little creativity within a set of clear principles.
If I had changed my presentation at all in that moment, it would have served only to confirm her confusion and lack of sureness about moving forward with my float. This might seem confusing, because we talk a good bit about adjusting our presentation to fit the horse.  In this case, I adjusted to inspire her sureness by offering an unchanging feel of release – in this case, that meant I kept my tempo the same, my life the same, with a feel for her to leave the area 15ft behind her tail.

I kept walking, on a path that looked rather like she was lunging me. She continued to offer all four feet in place, rather like a cat, without traveling forward, but actively picking up each foot as she pivoted around her center to stay with my float.

I had no plan around escalating anything – just a tempo to rely on and life to tune into and follow with her feet in the direction of the feel of the float. There was a feel of release offered in the float – pulling, or even taking the slack out at all would have served only to bury her shoulders even more. I continued on around in this fashion for a circle or more, as she continued to offer her feet in a pivot without actually following. Suddenly the hesitation in her expression  changed to a clear decision to follow, and she walked towards my float with some sureness.

This might seem like a ridiculous amount of time to allow a horse to not be in complete compliance with my request. But let’s consider for a moment, why did it take this much time?  Because this mare needed that much time to clear the fog of uncertainty and confusion of the past few months, to gain confidence that she was not under pressure to meet a requirement, which gave way to seeing clearly again, as she began to trust in the meaning carried in the feel. That takes in quite a lot, and it is no wonder it took a short while. Then she was able to tune into the moment and its feel. And that was when, as Bill Dorrance helps us understand, she “got ready”. After that the feel just went to her feet.

Her confidence was not well rooted yet though – like someone trying something for the first time.. “I think I can”. My commitment was for her to be clear that following the feel was the job. It was obvious that her minimal confidence in her decision meant she would likely not travel very far. I adjusted after a stride or two and we blended together to a stop. That way, she experienced following a feel and being right for a second time.
I started the mare out on the other rein. She freed up into a trot with a gentle ease about her, showing how available she could be, if shaped to offer it through her body.  She was light and offered to keep that amount of life going without any need to drive her forward.

I shaped her to release her into a new turn. She tried to turn, and now came to a similar stop in this direction, as she had earlier. I offered a similar presentation for her to follow my feel, as I kept the same tempo and life without escalation, and allowed the time for her to sort this out. This time it took less than a circle for her to make the decision to follow the feel of direction. Again I blended with her to a stop, as she followed my feel.

I had not meant for the mare to stop of course. She seemed to know that, and almost seemed surprised that she had stopped. It did not seem to match her plan somehow. She seemed a tad bewildered and unsure what to do next with her feet.

THAT VEIN OF GOLD AGAIN, BUT EACH ONE IS UNIQUE

We were at that spot again, the one mentioned earlier, that is often journeyed through when transitioning to a feel-based approach in which an escalation of pressure to achieve a particular response is not the strategy. My job for her was to follow my feel and she had done exactly that. Yet here she was again, stuck in her accurate delivery of the foundation previously taught, and hesitant about how to be right and/or whether to expect increased pressure from me in her uncertainty.  An escalation would not serve my purpose here. I needed to help her restore her balanced and athletic locomotion so she could succeed in her offer.

That special, catalytic spot presented differently this time: her mind had stayed with me. She was still following my feel, as she offered all four feet repeatedly and turned to stay with my float, but her forward movement had got stuck.

It seemed to matter to her a great deal that she would choose the right answer.

I wanted to be sure in that moment of two things:  first, that she had time to sort out that simply following my feel was exactly what was expected – the new job; and second, that she felt right in every try she made. It was my commitment to her to convey my meaning, through a feel of release, so her try would always be right – if it wasn’t what I meant, I would adjust.